Saturday, December 19, 2009

A Great Way to Lower Earth's Temperature

Rather than reaching an agreement on making "carbon credit" transfer payments to developing countries, lets just call previous aid payments "carbon credits". That's gotta be good for, what, 2 degrees Celsius.

We need to be careful not to apportion too much past aid though. We don't want to lower the planet's temps too much. I'm thinking changing the name of "aid" given by the West from...say... 1986 onwards should be about right. Should cool things down in a jiffy.

However, in order to keep temperatures up in really cold places like Winnipeg and Edmonton, a portion of Canada's aid given will be withheld from the accounting.

UPDATE: Due to the incredibly strong demand by folks in Winnipeg and Edmonton to raise their respective temperatures, it's been decided that not only will a portion of Canadian past aid be withheld from the accounting, a group of Western Canadians will actually go to various developing countries and take back the aid we have given.
UPDATE II: Great ideas in the comments. Heck, we can solve "global warming" today, right here!


  1. I like the way you think....what if we have overpaid in the past.... maybe they will have to pay some back.. these surplus funds could be used to inject capital in the banking system ..thus solving the economic crisis...i wonder if there is a way to use this to solve the health care problem?

  2. Better yet...leave out places like Africa and India and Central America - (you know, like the scientists left out Siberia) - that would cool things down in a hurry too!

    Better yet - use only Winter temperatures - you know, the North from Sept to March and the south from April to August. That would really do the trick

  3. When are we going to stop this futile war on the weather?

    Kudos to the world leaders in Copenhagen for failing to come up with a solution to this non-problem.

  4. Heh. There is a 2-word solution to the whole (alleged) Global Warming thing here:

    Global Warming: Why we are skeptical

  5. The best thing you ever did was remove yourself from MacLean's. Don't go back, you fucking piece of shit liar. You've ruined enough discussions to last a lifetime.

  6. Good post! Write a post on this: